As we fast approach the beginning of a New Year, so many people start to talk about making resolutions that often end up putting your attention into the future … I’m going to invite you to do the opposite!
What if the whole thing about New Year’s resolutions was counter-productive and has been a tantalising trick of the mind?
- Are you over all the judgment and expectation that comes with New Year?
- Have you had enough of letting yourself down with failed promises?
- Do you find yourself overcommitting to things, people or work?
- Do you find yourself struggling to remember what is important to you and end up getting busy just to distract yourself?
- Are you someone who spends a lot of time stuck in your head and paralysed by analysis?!
- MOST IMPORTANTLY, have you ever stopped to ask yourself why you do all that?
I ask those of you who make resolutions each year on 1st January, what is your experience of what happens when you set these type of goals? Do you actually experience transformation and lasting shifts in your behaviour? Or do you find that after a few days, weeks or if you are really tenacious, a month or two, the old behaviour you have been trying to change, re-emerges or something equally as annoying pops up to replace it!
The problem with most resolutions is that they sit in the old paradigm of fixing and changing behaviours which you judge as being wrong or dysfunctional. So the focus goes on what is wrong and needs to go away rather than having your attention on what you love or what you are moving towards.
You see, we get what we predominantly focus on with our thoughts. Simply put, if our energy is on what we don’t want and what we don’t like, we get more of that. And wherever there is resistance, you get more resistance.
As you are constantly creating your experience in each moment, both consciously and more importantly, unconsciously it pays to wise up to what is going through your mind. Meditation is a perfect way of becoming more conscious and although for the beginner, it can be quite confronting to bear witness to what is going on in your head, over time you begin to see some fascinating patterns.
It is said that we have between 50-70,000 thoughts a day with only 5000 of them original and the rest being repetitive and mostly negative self-talk. Until we can turn to face those thoughts and feel the emotions that swim around with them, we will forever be caught in a cycle resistance and exhaustion from over-thinking.
Instead of this year making more resolutions and plans to fix what is ‘wrong’, how about you get present and take stock of what is happening right here and now and FEEL what is going on before adding a whole lot more into your life.
I’m an expert in supporting people to reach clarity where there is confusion. I encourage people to love and respect who they are by wising up to what is really going on for them so that they can make true and authentic choices in each moment and I support people to break addictive patterns of behaviour and focus their minds on what really brings them peace of mind and joy.
If that speaks to you , I am interested in talking with you and would be delighted to see if there’s a fit for us to partner up. I have 5 more places available for my 3-month partner program and looking for those 5 people to make the beginning of 2016 really count.
with love
David
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“The quieter you become, the more you can hear.” Ram Dass
After spending a glorious week in Tasmania recently, I was reminded of how vital it is to keep coming back to the place of peace and quiet within. Nature offers so much when it comes to dropping out of my head and its never-ending torrent of thoughts and provides an instant bridge into the present moment.
When you quieten your mind enough, you can feel and then express the wisdom that comes through you. This is sometimes called intuition, inter-connectedness, source-energy, love. Whatever it is called in your world, make it a priority to connect with it through stillness and watch with wonderment how life unfolds with all its synchronicity and perfection.
I find that in working with people, they often expect this to be easy, and come with no pressure or challenge when they are in this space but this is a misconception of the truth. This is where ‘personal transformation’ becomes woo-woo and leaves people feeling cynical and full of doubt.
Having the ability to feel this quietness within, no matter what is going on around you is what must be fostered, with conscious practice and diligence. As your resilience builds, so does your peace of mind.
I am opening my practice to partnering up with 3 more people who know that it is time for them to build their emotional resilience and want more peace and certainty in their lives. These people already can feel that they are ready but may keep falling prey to their thoughts and fears of capability and resources. I urge you three to dig deep and step up , I am here to support you to reach the clarity and peace of mind that allows you to live a fully expressed life. If you feel even the faintest pull within, I look forward to hearing from you so that we can discover if there is a fit for what I can offer.
Do you hold back on giving yourself things or experiences you love and which make you feel good? Do you know, not just intellectually know that you are unlimited and abundant by nature?
We often don’t realise that we are treating ourselves as paupers rather than acknowledging the truth that we are THE single most important person in our world. Though it’s a common religious belief to put others needs and desires first, this action can only truly and unconditionally be done by coming from a place of full and undeniable value of YOURSELF first. Take care of your inner experience of happiness and peace before looking to give it elsewhere.
How else are we going to give ourselves the real-life, embodied experience of our abundant nature, unless we are willing to keep the lines of energy open within ourselves. What this in practical terms means is to open your heart and mind and move towards a deep and unshakeable place of TRUST WITHIN. To do this, we have to take ourselves to the uncomfortable edge, the place that is challenging and brings up fearfulness. The exact opposite of what our head and its chatter monkey tells us. When you do this consciously, with support and guidance, you build your resilience and confidence in living freely in the moment. You show yourself through real-life experience, that you have got your own back.
I call this ‘living on the comfortably-uncomfortable edge’. And this edge takes some practice and diligence. It takes a willingness to follow your intuition, your feeling inside that guides you without rational back-upable proof! It takes regular and consistent leaps into the unknown and taking actions that your safety mechanisms won’t like or agree with.
So if your uncomfortable edge is like most people, about money, then I challenge you to take yourself to the edge. The thing you have loved which you have kept locked up in your head for a while, you know, the one whose price tag is beyond your current comfort zone, make the choice to buy it. Yes of course you will have many voices of judgment come up, ‘I’m being reckless!’, ‘what if I get unexpected bills!” , or my particular favourite, “how do I know that it’s something that I truly want and that I’m not going to regret it?!”
Without taking a risk, you will never give yourself the the circumstances VITAL to show yourself your abilities and certainty within. You will continue to sell yourself short.
Expect discomfort, instead of being surprised by it.
I challenge you to remind yourself of a time in your life where you stretched yourself, where you just didn’t know if you could make it through something, that you felt at breaking point and had sleepless nights. Then notice how you felt AFTER that experience, how you felt more expanded, more alive, more certain. What if you were able to remain focussed on that expanded and alive space, the space where you felt empowered and trusting?
- Perhaps you have been sitting back and waiting for the ‘right time’…a sneaky way of not trusting.
- Perhaps you are always playing it safe, worrying about tomorrow instead of jumping in today…not trusting.
- Perhaps you have been ‘saving for a rainy day’ or insuring or backing-up for the future…not-trusting.
- Perhaps you are waiting for your head to agree with your heart, missing out on living in the moment…not trusting!
- Perhaps you’re riddled with self-doubt, lack of confidence, feeling scared or paralysed into inaction…again not trusting!!
All of these things and more besides can be moved through. They don’t need to keep you a prisoner in your own life. It’s time to show yourself that you are more than the limited thoughts and ideas you have in your head. It’s time that you showed yourself what it is like to live a fully expressed life that you love.
I am enrolling now for my 3-month Coaching Partner Program and am looking for 4 new people to join me. In this program you will be able to show yourself how and why you have limited yourself and your choices. What you have played small about and why you feel blocked and unsure. You will also learn how to break through this confusion and old habits. You will show yourself what happens when you really have a safe space to explore, free of judgement and stop playing small. 12 short weeks to show yourself the possibilities and make some real shifts in your life.
Do you feel the tingle?! Making a commitment to work with me is the first big step in showing yourself that you deserve to live a fully expressed life. Drop me a line and I’ll be happy to explore working with you to get what it is you would love to have for yourself.
#coretruths #liveafullyexpressedlife #sellyourselfshortnomore
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You know, those small seemingly easy-to-overlook decisions where you take the safe option, the ‘anything for a quiet life” choice, the ‘better the devil you know’ way of life which leads down the same old path of feeling uninspired and mediocre. Sometimes, if you are really paying attention, you will notice that the choices you are making don’t even feel like yours, it’s like you are playing out someone else’s life.
Every time you compromise and hold back out of fear….
Every time you have not made a choice to follow what you love for fear of consequences? Not enough time, not enough money, and then all of a sudden its another year of your life thats gone by…
Every time you say you are going to do something new or challenging but then pull back?…
Here’s the deal… and it sounds funny but I have the latest lyrics from Madonna ringing in my ears:
“It might sound like I’m an unapologetic bitch but sometimes you know I gotta call it like it is!!!” …
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE RIGHT TIME TO TAKE A LEAP. Stop waiting for it! Your logical rational mind isn’t wired for the unknown,the new, the inspired. In fact it’s fair to say that it has a great aversion to it most of the time!
Of late I have noticed a lot of people absolutely feeling a Yes! to do something or a feeling to go somewhere or take action on something but then a WHOLE lot of backtracking bullshit stories appear, a whole load of holding off until ‘the right time’ or waiting for the fear to subside, or waiting for their head to to agree with their feeling.
Again I wish to declare: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE RIGHT TIME TO TAKE A LEAP!
The right time is there and then-the moment that the feeling occurs to you IS the best time. We have got so used to trying to get our head to agree to what our heart is telling us and that can take forever- so then you end up living a lot of NEVER.
Stop living your life waiting! Its only ever going to be your head trying to catch up with the infinite wisdom and knowing that your feeling has available to it. Life is only ever lived in the present moment, but just how often are you inhabiting the moment?
And that’s where I can support you. When I work with my clients, I support them to live a fully expressed life through clearing the clutter they have allowed to build up in their heads so that they USE the wisdom and certainty thats already within them. They stop apologising for what they know to be true, stop playing small and limiting their lives by telling themselves bullshit stories that they have ended up believing out of habit. I work with people who mean business with themselves and who are tired of feeling limited and shying away from what they love. It’s time to bring the fullness of who you are into play and show up with all of your might.
Im currently looking for 4 more people who resonate with what I have shared, who’ve had enough of stalling and putting off putting themselves first and daring to live an authentic and inspired life. These people are no longer willing to agree with mediocrity and compromise and want to move through their ideas of limitation. They’ve had enough of letting themselves off the hook and criticising and judging themselves. And they are over the ways in which they sabotage themselves whenever they go for what they love.
Are you one of the 4? If you feel a pull within, I’m interested in speaking with you to determine if we are the right fit and that I can support you to get what it is you need.
#liveafullyexpressedlife #coretruths #mediocritysucks #thereisnoRIGHTtime
Picture Credit:(https://www.flickr.com/photos/david_z/)
You’ve probably heard of the old adage, “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.”
I want to share a little about timing.
Of late I have noticed a lot of people absolutely feeling a Yes! or feeling to do something or to go somewhere or take action on something but then a WHOLE lot of backtracking, a whole load of holding off until ‘the right time’ or waiting for the fear to subside, or waiting for their head to to agree with their feeling happens.
May I be bold and say that THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE ‘RIGHT’ TIME.
The right time is there and then- the moment that the feeling occurs to you IS the best time. There is only the now. All the doubt and backtracking and indecisiveness are just the games we play with ourselves by listening to our head!
I have an excellent example I can give you, one on my family members actually who will remain nameless (lol! you know who you are!). They moved into a new home back in the late 90’s and began looking at what they could do to improve the place and started by removing an old fireplace which was in the way of where the beautiful new large lounge they had purchased needed to go. SO out came the fireplace and instead of filling the hole up, they decided that the wall was probably going to be replaced by a new extension to the room so they would hold off for the right time. The couch was placed in front of the hole so no-one was the wiser- out of sight, out of mind.
Well, it’s now 2015 and guess what? YES you’ve got it! The hole is still there, 17 years later, enough time to do 4 renovations and extensions!
A life lived with a lot of WHAT IF”S, MAYBE’S, SHOULD’S, WOULD”S and MIGHT’S means you are letting fear run your life by avoiding mistakes, avoiding the present moment where all life is lived and the inevitable feeling of powerlessness that comes with it.
We have got so used to trying to get our head to agree to what our heart is telling us which can take forever- then you end up living a lot of NEVER.
Stop living your life waiting! Its only ever going to be your head trying to catch up with the infinite wisdom and knowing that your feeling has available to it.
Learn to move through the discomfort of change and following what you know deep inside is true for you.
Like the client who has lived 47 years of his life hiding who he was -or another who stays in a safe role at work which is prestigious but leaves her feeling empty and exhausted – or a self-confessed corporate high-flyer whose health had to get so compromised before she decided that she needed to do something differently. All of whom are now breaking out of the self-imposed restrictions and beginning to fully express themselves.
Living a fully expressed life doesn’t have to mean being the next Prime Minister (although perhaps it might!), it simply means rising above the story that your head dictates to you through the thoughts that you keep entertaining.
Let’s partner up for a period of time to support you to live your life in the here and now. To follow the inspired feeling that is within you. To move with more clarity and focus to lead a life which is fully expressed… AND to stop waiting for the ‘right’ time, one of the biggest fallacies we keep getting fooled by.
You know who you are! I look forward to your call.
❤
#thereisonlynow #fullyexpressedlife #nevertoolate #followyourfeeling
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