One of the biggest challenges I see and have experienced on a path of self-realisation is the immense effort that goes into staying open-hearted (and minded) when the pressure of your circumstances in your story is on. Whether that pressure appears to be coming from your relationships, your business, your finances or something else, the pressure comes from the judgmental thoughts and ideas you have about what is or isn’t happening. It is only when you reflect on the past or project into the imagined future (based upon the past) that the problem arises. In effect you literally flavour the challenges with the past and with what you have deemed positive or negative.
Your thoughts have no hold on you when you are in the here and now. When you make it your practice to be present, you allow yourself to be still internally where you are able to come from a certain, no-doubt space. Your actions will come from a deep and grounded place within rather than a headspace of stress and reaction. This is true leadership and you will find that the people around you will be attracted to that in you.
So what can you do to stay open-hearted and minded under pressure?
One great way is to be conscious of who you spend your time with. You don’t have to do it alone but are you the type of person who shares everything about your challenges with anyone who will listen and open yourself up for advice? ( which you don’t really need nor ultimately listen to or heed anyway!) This habit opens you up to other people’s thinking which, if you hadn’t noticed already just makes things more cloudy and complicated and pollutes your space. Sometimes it is great to have a sounding board, a ‘get it off your chest’ session to allow yourself to let the emotions move through you can be very useful so long as the person you do it with knows how to hold space. By holding space I mean that they are present with you but do not go into resolve your situation, they don’t judge whatever it is that you are going through no matter how painful it may appear. They are aware and know that their presence is enough. This is where an excellent coach or facilitator comes in. I find these people to be very rare but well worth having if you can find one.
Another way is to remind yourself of a couple of points:
You would never put yourself in a position that you cannot handle. Yes things can appear very crazy and out of control and bring up a lot of fearful emotions but it’s impossible that you don’t have your own back. The secret is to practice dropping out of your head to listen to what it is you already know and be prepared to follow through on that. Build a practice of this!
If you look historically in your life, the times where you have felt most expanded and empowered has always been preceded by a really tough time. The old adage, “the darkest moment comes just before the dawn’ makes a lot of sense here. When you are going through challenges times, it is there to support you to know yourself and your capacity to a greater degree- or else it simply wouldn’t be happening. Stop having amnesia about this!
Make it a practice of placing your attention on the one thing which is in front of you at a time. Our energy and attention scatters and our anxiety and stress levels blow out the moment we try to fix, change and improve everything all at once. When you get more practiced at becoming present and dropping out of your headspace, you will find the power that lies in giving your full attention to whatever is in front of you. You will feel sharper and more focused overall and will find that you achieve more by doing less.Remember one thing at a time!
If this blog sparks something inside for you, please feel free to email me privately at David@CoreTruth.com.au or head over to my website www.CoreTruth.com.au for more.
I have no advice to offer you because I know that everyone has their own answers already. But I do have the single, most important thing anyone can offer you and that is presence and non-judgment which allows you to enter the here and now of your life. The only place where anything happens.
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When you are on the ‘hamster wheel’ of your life and simply doing what you are convinced by your thoughts that you have to do, you miss out on the very thing where you find true peace of mind and contentment.
When you are measuring your success through others eyes and by the collection of material and intellectual wealth around you, you are missing out on the very thing where you find true peace of mind and contentment.
When you believe the thoughts and emotions of limitation that run through your head continuously and miss what is happening around you in the here and now then you are missing out on the very thing where you find true peace of mind and contentment.
When you are convinced that you not good enough just as you are and that there is always somewhere else to be, that the grass is greener, then you are missing out on the very thing where you find true peace of mind and contentment.
When you are at the mercy of your job, your relationships, your financial situation and you live your life in compromise, guilt or regret then you are missing out on the very thing where you find true peace of mind and contentment.
CoreTruth Context Coaching is all about reminding you of the magnificence and perfection of who you already are, in your core, beneath the thoughts, emotions, judgments and ideas that keep telling you otherwise.
Over the past 10 years I have worked with hundreds of people who could feel that there must be more to life. People who were managing, controlling, forcing and avoiding things in their life. Most have been outwardly successful and abundant but all were experiencing a feeling of emptiness and lack of true and lasting joy in their lives.
I have worked with small business owners, CEO”S of large International companies, one of Australia’s top four banking corporations and also individuals who are unemployed, scared, confused, depressed and anxiety ridden across all ages, globally. I support those people who are tired of chasing the next solution outside of themselves and who are no longer willing to play by the usual rules and ways of living life.
I offer this predominantly through online or face-to-face sessions but also facilitate mindfulness and CoreTruth workshops which are ideal for business leadership off-sites and creative inspiration days.
I have no ‘five-steps’ to fix your life because I know that there is nothing about you that needs fixing.
I do however have plenty of ways to keep your mind occupied and distracted while we get on with the only thing that truly shifts your experience of life and that is the conscious awareness which comes from being 100% in the here and now with you in a space of no judgment and full compassion.
My private one-on-one sessions provide a space where I guarantee that you will, with a committed practice move back into integrity with yourself. I know that you have every answer to every problem within you already. It comes down to how much you will listen to what you know and feel to be true and follow it through. I support you to ‘clean out the rubbish’ so that you re-gain the clarity that’s always been there.
And, most importantly, I know and love who I am and what I do so I understand that it is possible for everyone to experience this, regardless of your starting point!
I am available online once-a-week on Skype or telephone if this speaks to you and feels like what you are looking for.
I will support you to see why you can’t afford not to begin this journey back to your CoreTruth rather than me wasting our time convincing you that you need it. Please simply send me a private message to David@CoreTruth.com.au to arrange a time to speak.
Much love to you x
Conscious relationships – Imagine what it would be like to be in a relationship with a foundation of unconditional love. Where each person takes responsibility for the whole of the relationship and how they experience it. Where neither look to each other to complete themselves but each stand in their own clear and powerful expression of themselves and simply choose to love and connect with the other. Where each chooses to support the other to be the greatest version of themselves they can be beyond any conventional idea of commitment and social ideal.
Our relationships are such an enormous part of our lives. They are the perfect ground for our highest moments of joy and bliss and also for the complete opposite. They can inspire and energise us or have the capacity to distract, overwhelm and bring up all kinds of uncomfortable emotions.
Conscious relating sees each individual as whole and powerful without a need for one another. It holds a space which means that there is no room for blame and judgement of each partner for not having what is expected. It debunks the common idea of 50/50 relating which can only lead to expectation, disappointment and resentment. It creates a strong platform for honest and upfront communication which paves the way to heart connection and acceptance.
Whether you are a couple who are experiencing conflict and trouble, or simply reaching a place which feels limited or stagnant then consider CoreTruth sessions as a powerful foundational approach to relating which turns how we generally look at coupleship on its head. It is different to conventional ‘couples counselling’ as it doesn’t look to manage or apportion blame for what is happening in your relationship but rather supports each individual to get clear and consciously choose how they would like to be in relationship to the other and commit to that. It shows that for change to occur in the relationship, the change must be an individual choice and action.
There is a minimum commitment of 6 months for this program which provides the arena for true, foundation shifting love!
Each couples situation and requirements are different and there will be a mix of individual and joint sessions however usually it requires 1x 1hr session per individual, held weekly.
To be considered for the 6 month Conscious Relating program it is a requirement to have an initial meeting to connect and ensure that this is a suitable way forward for you. Please contact me to arrange an informal consultation which is complimentary with no obligation to commit.
“Despite our passion for romantic love, relationships are not the easiest way to find love and peace. They are, however, one of the most effective for finding our blocks.
Relationships naturally bring out into full view our desires, attachments and unconscious programs – our likes, dislikes, belief systems, judgments, compulsions, conformities, etc. Relationships challenge us because they take us deep into thoughts, feelings and experiences we have suppressed for a lifetime. That’s why they provide the very best arena for personal growth!
“Human relationships are the perfect tool for sanding away our rough edges and getting at the core of divinity within us.” -Eknath Easwaran
