I work with people to re-calibrate their measure of success from what’s happening externally to what’s happening within.
I find that a lot of people who are drawn to work with me are by usual measurements in society, pretty successful. They have had successful lives in business and in relationships and life generally. However they still have a feeling of unease or dissatisfaction within no matter what they strive for and achieve on the outside.
When I view the business world and in particular the leaders of business I find that , like in life generally, people allow themselves to be led by their emotions. Now for most, that’s not particularly revelatory or indeed rocket science but what it means when it comes to leading constructively in tough times is that a courageous leader would be equipped with the ability to be emotionally resilient. (Note RESILIENT not RESISTANT). Which means that they would be able to fully experience the emotions moving through them that are sparked by what is going on around them but are plugged into a deeper, more grounded and still place inside which is un-shakeable. There’s a recognition that there is no point in avoiding the natural death and resurrection cycle of life within business and by being meta to the surface reality of what is going on, it gives you a leadership edge.
It’s easy to have your head convince you of separateness when you don’t have a practice of being present. The thoughts and emotions can take you over and convince you in an instant.
I’ve noticed this happening for many people particularly in the past couple of weeks where the tendency to buy into the story of fear and judgment has been strong. I feel a link between that and the increased amount of fearful media and spreading of propaganda which stirs up the primal fight or flight response in many.
Stepping out of the story and being selective about what you listen to and surround yourself with goes part of the way in building your resilience but also a practice of mindfulness and stillness is invaluable.
The more there is a critical mass of people choosing to drop out of their heads and into their feeling, the more we will be following what is true for us rather than following the pied piper blindly.
#courage #buyingintofear #presence
After a recent session with a client I was moved to ponder more deeply on the question; Why do we fill up our time with busyness? It’s because it makes us feel (or not feel) something… more of something- more important, valuable, powerful, needed, secure. Or indeed avoiding by feeling less of something- angry, sad, disappointed, not good enough.
This is why so often we feel like a hamster on a wheel, doing things on autopilot without being connected to our truth. There’s so much burnout from over commitment and therefore feelings of overwhelm take over. Two of the most common experiences I hear people complain of when I’m supporting clients in their self-realisation process are anxiety and depression, both of which are states caused by being in our heads, over-and projecting into the future or the past. At the extreme end of this pendulum this habitual over-thinking is often diagnosed as manic depressiveness and Bi-polar disorder. (more…)